[this is a thing]

Sometimes I think of myself as Abed Nadir (from Community); I like to speculate. People are so interesting all of time time and they don’t even know it. They brush off thoughts of being interesting and call their everyday lives boring or lame, which I find astounding. The way she plays with her hair when talking, his odd gesticulations, the way they smile at each other when something has gone completely awry. Everyone is so interesting.

I am a cynical person. I naturally dislike/am skeptical of people until they prove to me that they are unworthy of the dislike I place upon them. People who rise above my expectations are the people I usually enjoy and befriend quickly. Yes, sometimes my perspective of a thing or a person does shift. But, that is not always caused by a big thing, but usually takes place when focused on the little things. For example: I have little quirks that are unintentionally trademark for me. You do too. One day, when observing a good friend, I saw she suddenly had a second-rate version of these quirks that I call my own. We used to spend a lot of time together, and out of the blue, my quirks were displayed on her persona. No, it is not because we spent a lot of time together, because, the traits would come over time (like everyone in VAS saying “K bye.” after a period of hearing it so much from Kersten that it became second nature). No, my traits came out of her like word vomit from a nervous child. At that point, she became interesting. She didn’t know it, but, at that moment our friendship ended. She was trying to become me; no, I’m not being vain. She was trying to become me because that was the only kind of friendship she knew; one that fed off of another until friends became equal or until she was at the top. Anyone that threatened her climb to the top, she tried to feed on. This was getting ridiculous. The little things tend to sting more. The little things make a perfect relationship. The little things break a perfect relationship.

Another thing that I find interesting, is society’s portrayal of being happy. Having a significant other, looking hot all the time, live happily ever after. That is total bullshit.

I don’t have a boyfriend, I do not look hot all the time, it’ll take me a few tries to find a person I would like to spend my life with, and I am so happy with where I am right now. You don’t understand how much I love and cherish waking up everyday and living my life. I’m so overjoyed that it’s disgusting. Absolutely and utterly disgusting. It’s very rare to see a cynical optimist these days, I think, and that’s why, when found, they stick together (like Nia & I). Abed Nadir, Britta Perry, Liz Lemon, Leslie Knope, Penny Hartz, Pam Beesly, Jim Halpert, Rachel Berry, Kurt Hummel, Don Draper, Peggy Olson, Joan Holloway, etc. Tv show characters. Cynical optimists. I think that’s why I and others tend to gravitate towards TV, there are more people like us there. It’s so absolutely fascinating, the world of TV. I love it that a lot of the main characters are cynical optimists. This is a thing I hate about TV: devolving character development. Take Rachel Berry from Glee. At first she was naïve and was a girl, for lack of a better term. She was a girl until the episode “Mash-up” in the first season when she dated Puck. For the first time, Rachel confronted a relevant situation that picked her brain. She confronted Finn Hudson for using her. I think that’s where her character development really started. The writers then built her up as a strong independent woman, then placing her in the arms another equally capable man (I say another because Puck and Rachel are perfect) who she later confronted for another reason, more building of a determined young woman—and there. Right there. They brought Finn back into her life. And poof, she’s right back to where she started. I hate that so much. Seeing a character you relate to falling back into their old ways pisses the shit out of me. It’s the same for the people in real life, too. Seeing a person who has grown so much internally then dilapidate and fall into their own ways. This confusing enigma tends to sting to a person who notices it, doesn’t it?

And this is the part that really puzzles me. Why do people hate themselves? Why? It’s so…I just don’t understand. Okay, we all know that somewhere out there someone’s got it better than us, and somewhere out there someone’s got it worse than us. I think we should be happy and grateful with where we are placed. (and to the non-religious people, here’s where I get a little preachy-preachy) I believe that God put us all on this Earth for a reason, whether to rise above, sink low, or to simply stay where you are. In what ever situation you’re in. Smile. Though times are shitty. Smile. When you cry so hard that you can’t breathe. Breathe. Defy whatever horrid labels that are placed upon you, and try your darnedest to please yourself and whatever you may believe in—whether it be God, Oprah, or even the power of music.

Puckleberry, Glee:

Calzona, Grey’s Anatomy

Karen + Drinks & Drugs, Will & Grace:

Leslie Knope + waffles, Parks and Recreation:

Jam, The Office:

Dwangela, The Office:

Erin + Andy, The Office:

Michael Scott + Holly Flax, The Office:

Andy + April, Parks and Recreation: